Wednesday, December 16, 2009

GAY MARRIAGE?! Stand up Comedy by Lizzy the Lezzy

I thought it was time to make a video about gay (same sex) marriage. Gays and lesbians can get married in Belgium, Canada, the Netherlands, Norway, South Africa, Spain and Sweden, where the law concerning marriage was just amended to include gay people as well as straight. In England you can get a "civil partnership", which basically gives you the same legal rights as a marriage, but if you're straight, you can't get a civil partnership. Marriage is inextricably linked to religion, and we all know what religious people think of gays. What happened to "love thy neighbor"? What happened to "treat others as you would unto yourself"? Why is homosexuality so hard for some people to swallow? hehe.



Times are  changing, in some places, and hopefully the rest of the world will follow. Maybe we can't expect these changes to take place overnight, but look at where we are now compared to 20 years ago, when I was still struggling with my own sexuality. Today I am grateful for what gays and lesbians have achieved in my lifetime -- for Ellen, for the L Word, for all the lesbian story-lines on popular mainstream TV shows, like Weeds, Nip Tuck, and Grey's Anatomy, for films like Harvey Milk and Brokeback Mountain, for Adam Lambert, for George Michael - I still LOVE George Michael! And I love @stephenfry and his wife @MrsStephenFry. I'm glad I've witnessed this progress in my lifetime. Maybe in the next 20 years America will have an openly gay or lesbian President!

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Lizzy's Dirty Little Lesbian Book!

I've written a funny, dirty little lesbian book called "Lizzy the Lezzy Gets Laid!" It's written in Lizzy rhyme with full color pictures of Lizzy on her exciting lesbian adventures.

This video is Part 1 (of 3) of the book launch that was held in Tel Aviv last Saturday, with Ruth reciting some poetry and Lizzy singing songs that were specially written to go with the book. This episode has Lizzy singing a song for the teacher that she had a crush on at school. More info about the book on http://www.lizzythelezzy.com



p.s. dear lezzymom, since you are the only follower of this blog, i just wanted to say hi! xx

Thursday, April 2, 2009

Straight Girls

Many straight girls secretly desire a lesbian experience, but maybe never sought out the opportunity or were too scared to follow through. They're sure of their sexuality but they just wanna check it out, because they're sexually liberated. But when it comes to the crunch, they don't really wanna lick your pussy. Mostly they're just fantasizing.



When a straight girl meets a lesbian, she immediately tries to flirt with her, she wants to know that if she were to sleep with a woman, that this lesbian wants to sleep with her. What she forgets, is that lesbians don't think through their dicks, or feel a need to prove that they can satisfy a straight girl, or turn her lesbo, so most have already crushed the possibility of sleeping with her as soon as they find out she's straight. But it doesn't stop us from fantasizing.

Saturday, March 21, 2009

Goodbye L Word!




So, the L Word has finally come to a dramatic lesbian end and we'll never know what happened to psycho Jenny or if Max's waters broke all over Helena's new Persian rug. I managed to watch it just in time, before it was removed from Youtube. And I loved watching Portia on Ellen's show, it really warmed the cockles of my little heart.

So what's next for the lesbians then? I heard something about a funny farm, should be good. And I heard something about a film called "Lesbian Vampire Killers" - ooh, can't wait to see that one, I don't think. But I'm sure watch it anyway, even though the two main characters are guys and it's had shit reviews.

Because we'll watch anything and everything lesbian, or lesbian themed. Good or bad. Because with every fresh lesbian kiss on TV, a lesbian angel gets her wings, and millions of lesbians all over the world go, "Ahhhhhhhhhhh". Well, a bit more than "Ahhh" actually, right girls? ;)

Goodbye L Word. I'll miss your kisses.
xxx

Saturday, February 14, 2009

Happy Bloody Valentine's Day!

I can't believe it. I spent the whole week planning a romantic Valentine's Day for me and my new girlfriend, with lots of fun activities all leading to sex, and I've woken up with my period and stomach cramps!

Don't get me wrong, I know it's not all about my own personal sexual gratification, but who has the energy to perform properly, when all you really want to do is lie under a blanket with a hot water bottle, and watch crappy saturday telly?

I don't feel like getting all dressed up in my bondage suit, I don't feel like eating sushi off my girlfriend's bottom, I don't feel sexy at all. I've got a painful zit on my chin, I've already cried 5 times and I feel an obsessive compultion to clean the house. Valentine's Day was not meant to be like this. I'm supposed to feel like rose petals and pink blancmange, and instead I feel like a cactus and cold rice pudding.

Well, darling. Here's the video I made for you anyway, perhaps we can do it all again in about 5 days time? What? You'll have your period then?

Perhaps that's where "lesbian bed death" comes from. Sex time during the month is already halved by periods, then add another week of two sets of sore tits and extreme mood swings, that leaves one week of each month to be in sync with each other - one night being too tired, one night with a headache, one night not to be in the mood, one night being depressed, one night there's a good film on and one night "I just feel like cuddling tonight, is that OK?". That leaves 1 day of the month which is actually doable and convenient for both of you. And that's surely the time you're bound to have an argument about not having enough sex!

Happy Valentine's Day everyone - I hope you get yours!



p.s. You can send this video to your loved one as a Lizzy E-card at http://www.lizzythelezzy.com/cards

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Gay Siblings! Stand up and be counted!

Well, I just uploaded a new video about gay siblings and already had many comments from people who are gay/lesbian and have gay/lesbian siblings! here's the video, but worth going over to http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zCpHKIGwRIY and having a read of the comments. there are LOADS of 'em!



have a gay day! :)